Jackson Free Press

It's "Boneqweesha Live" from the vault of the Let Me Hold Five Dollars National Bank with Rudy McBride, bank president and the Ghetto Science Team's financial adviser.

Boneqweesha: "Rudy, despite an ugly economy, where the rich got all the money and the poor catch all the flack, I heard that the LMHFD National Bank has some special savings and loan opportunities for the financially challenged."

Rudy McBride: "Right Boneqweesha! The LMHFD National bank understands that poor folks' money is as tight as a Mason jar seal. Therefore, we established the Let's Plant a Seed Money Tree and Water-Pool-O-Faith savings plans. When we let our customers hold five dollars, we ask them to plant some loose change—if they have any—into the "Money Tree Garden" or make a wish and throw a penny or two into the "Water-Pool-O-Faith." By next fall, we hope to have enough money to let folk hold an extra dollar. Also, for that special date, check out our "Finance for Romance" loan and get enough money for a movie with popcorn, Goobers and a smoothie. And, with the Ain't Nothin' Goin On But The Rent Diners Club Loan, couples can buy a steak and eat it, too. Finally, for back to overcrowded and understaffed schools, it is the recycled and used school-supplies loan program.

Boneqweesha: Thanks, Rudy! Remember the LMHFD National bank slogan: We'll let you hold five dollars, but you gotta pay us back! Boneqweesha-On-the-Scene reporting!"

Ken Stiggers is a television producer in Jackson and the co-host of The Lyric Lounge at Santiago's every Thursday night.