Jackson Free Press

Cootie McBride uses his S.U.V. to help Ghetto Science Team Counter-Intelligence agents conduct a drive-by investigation regarding a CIA leak. They stop at a prestigious Washington, D.C., hotel to take security guard Lee-Lee Johnson for a ride around the block.

Cootie McBride: "Brother Lee-Lee, the counter intelligence agents want to know if you have the low-down regarding the V.P. leaking a C.I.A. agent's ID."

Lee-Lee Johnson: "Are you the FBI?"

Cootie McBride: "No. We are the G.S.T.C.I., and we need your answer ASAP."

Lee-Lee Johnson: "I don't know. Since that brother called the police about a burglary at the Watergate hotel in 1972, the folk in power learned from their mistake. They avoid runnin' their mouths and tellin' their business when alert, conscientious and underpaid security guards are present."

G.S.T.C.I. Agent No. 1: "What happened to that brother?"

G.S.T.C.I. Agent No. 2: "He mysteriously lost his job—probably blacklisted—and stayed unemployed for years. He played a bit role as himself in the movie version of the book 'All the President's Men' and died in obscurity somewhere in Georgia."

Cootie McBride (sniffles as G.S.T.C.I. agents cry): "Agents, I think we are having a Ralph Ellison's "Invisible Man" moment. Go back to work, Lee-Lee. The investigation is over. Shucks, I need my cryin' towel!"

As Lee-Lee leaves Cootie's sport utility vehicle, we hear the "Law and Order" (doink-doink) audio cue. This scene ends with a graphic: "Law and Order in an S.U.V."