Jackson Free Press

One of our Rankin County readers just alerted us to this lovely piece of pontification in the Rankin Ledger, courtesy of one of the "journalists" who cooed over candidate Melton back when. Per Orley:

One can hardly help but notice that the mayor from Over There often is seen in the paper and on the TV wearing a gun. ... Anyway, the mayor from Over There has been much in the news, chasing crooks, taking bad guys into protective custody, refusing to tell anyone where he's stashed 'em, riding around with his SWAT team in his humongous Batmobile, asking random drivers if he can search their cars, threatening those who would threaten him (while SWAT guys wait on the porch in case anyone takes him up on it), being rude to Bert (a dastardly deed, that) and in general getting the mayoral mug on the TV about as often as Howard and Maggie. ...

That city Over There with the bantam rooster mayor gets all the pub, all the TV time, all the columns of outrage. ... So this is what I propose:

That all our mayors, from Florence to Flowood, from Pearl to Puckett, and all burgs in between, be issued shiny new Glocks, badges, bullet-resistant vests, pepper spray, mace, handcuffs and giant crime-fighting vehicles.

Oh, I almost forgot. We've got to have some crime, too. And not just some dope from Texas transporting bales of herb to Atlanta either.

Real crime.

Then our mayors can get out there and chase around their streets and proclaim how it is that they're making our world a safer place.

And then they will be somebody, like the mayor from Over There, and get on the TV and be famous.

Previous Commentsshow

Lest we forget, here's Orley back on May 8, 2005: So, "Frank" it is. Not "Mr. Mayor." Not "Mr. Melton." Just "Frank." As in, "Frank, the water's backin' up in my yard. C'mon over here and do something about it." Or, "Frank, I got a son who needs a job. Whatcha got over there with the city?" Maybe it's a media kind of thing, this easy familiarity, this we're-all-in-it-together thing, this newsroom model of egalitarian foxhole let's-go-get-'em togetherness. ... June 7 will be the baccalaureate service to May 3's graduation, more of a blessing than a decision, more of an exclamation point than an election.... Frank fried Harvey's gizzard with style. All by himself, he's a parade. Wherever he goes, he sweeps in like a Roman emperor on his way to pillage Carthage. He's like sunshine in the winter; you can't help but notice. One day he comes up to the paper and I'm sitting in Rick Cleveland's glass-walled office and Frank pops in to say hi, and you'd swear, like Ali or Frazier, he had an entourage trailing in his wake. But, no, it was just Frank, the Force 3 human tornado. ... Come summer, the rubber will meet the road. The relentless day-to-day responsibilities will be Frank's to carry: cops and crime, potholes and asphalt, drainage and sewage, public works and public parks. It's a load, being mayor of Jackson, a big ol' monster of a job. I can see him now, early in the morning, throwing the paper onto the desk of a department head. "Next time," Frank'll say, "let's fix this before it becomes a story." Ah. Hark! What's that sound? The sound of gullible columnists crunching on their words.

DonnaLadd

Apr 25 2006

You said it all, Donna. What can anyone else add? These journalists have shorter memories than Frank! And they talk out both sides of their mouths.

Ray Carter

Apr 26 2006

It makes me laugh to think of all the heads nodding silently in agreeable disgust when they read Jackson referred to as "Over There." Over There?? WHAT?? As in "Over There, where we work."?? And "Over There, where we buy our wine and bourbon."?? And "Over There, where we go when we want a really good meal at a nice restaurant, with adult beverages besides draft beer."?? And "Over There - the city that makes MY piddling town look GREAT!"?? I generally like Mr. Hood's pieces, but seeing that a majority of their readership is already IN places that aren't "Over Here," and the editorial team takes such pains to paint Over Here as dastardly and dangerous and dying, it seems disingenuous (not to mention a HUGE waste of money and resources) to publish niche papers that echo what's already being preached to all the choirs. Or maybe I'm crazy...

Jay

Apr 26 2006

Orley Hood... Didn't he jump the shark years ago? Coulda been good, but sold his soul to gannett.

Ironghost

Apr 26 2006

Looks like Orley is trying to jump off of a sinking ship. If only he had looked closer in the begining, he could have seen the holes in Frank's promises.

lance

Apr 26 2006

Orley Hood... Didn't he jump the shark years ago? It must've happened before I moved back.

DonnaLadd

Apr 26 2006

Orley also wrote a series of columns a few years back demanding that the state spend money to enable the coliseum to host a minor league hockey team. This was when southern hockey was the "wave of the future" - right after Canadian football in the South went bust. Orley had been to a minor league hockey game in Columbus Georgia and decided that, if the game could sell out there, there was no way it could miss here. Commissioner Spell expressed doubts about the viability of a team down here - and was taken to task frequently by Hood and other C/L sports writers. One minor league hockey team later....

Mr PR Professional

Apr 26 2006

Mr. O Hood wrote a piece a few years back singing the praises of a new priest in town. Father James Stein had only been in Jackson a few weeks when O wrote this article talking about how Stein was tireless in his work and very devoted in his 'calling' to work with teens. Stein was traveling between Chicago and Jackson 'doing his priestly duties', teaching in both cities! A year or so later, while teaching religion at St. Joe, Stein was summoned to Wisconsin to face second degree sexual assault charges. He pleaded no contest and went to prison for molesting a 14 year old boy. I wrote O to ask him how he had so much knowledge so quickly about Stein. I also asked him if he did any research to back up his story. He said 'no'. GREAT JOURNALISM, O!

Altered Boy

Apr 26 2006

The name Orley itself says it all for me. Even the name was suppose to be a joke.

Ray Carter

Apr 27 2006

when I was growing up in "J", we refered to the Rank and the Mad as "out there"......I had a long talk on the phone last night with a very good friend (of several in Jackson) about the evident turnaround and the coming projects all of which he says are a go. Also the number of people moving back in from "Out There".......but I must comment on my few contacts with developers who are "out there" in Rank and Mad and the vitrol I get when I bring up the good work being done in Jackson.

ATLExile

Apr 27 2006

It's been a slow Melton week. So, I thought I would post this "golly gee" Melton piece by Dan Modisett of WLBT. Seeing as how he lives in Clinton, this piece belongs with Orley and "Over There"

pikersam

May 18 2006

I saw it on TV. He deserves an award for spinning and dressing up the obvious. He could have said it all in one paragraph.

Ray Carter

May 18 2006

He could have shortened it into one sentance. :) Not too bad, and not "Over There"-ish either.

Ironghost

May 18 2006