Jackson Free Press

Ernest "Monday Night Football Head" Walker:

"High prices have crippled fixed incomes of broke people. Poor folk clench on to the little money they have and remain trapped in the ghetto. Idle minds of the poor and unemployed retaliate with desperate deeds against their own community. No money, no fun, no adventure, no justice, no peace.

"Have no fear, suburbanites! The sub-ordinate class will be out of sight and mind this summer because the Ghetto Science Community Coalition, Cootie McBride and Family, Clubb Chicken Wing Athletic Association, Pork-N-Piggly staff and I have established the 'Hot Fun in the Summa Time Community Basketball League.'

"Our purpose: to occupy the minds of impoverished, frustrated and discouraged individuals with weekly entertainment, courtesy of the athletes who live in poor neighborhoods. Remember the summer basketball leagues back in the day when folk came to see legends like Dr. J., The Hawk, Black Jesus and World B. Free juke, shake, head-fake, no-look pass, jump-shoot and slam dunk at the playground?

"Cold drinks, good food, great fellowship. No purse snatchings, no burglaries, no sexual assaults. Our community basketball league should remind you of that Sly Stone song: 'Hot fun in the summa time!'

"We invite you to our first celebrity basketball game at the Clubb Chicken Wing playground and athletic complex, featuring the McBride family vs. Crunchie Burga World. And watch for Nurse Tootie McBride. I hear she has a wicked cross dribble and jump shot."