Jackson Free Press

Paris Hilton is many things – but a nun?!

And not just any nun, Hilton is being considered to play Mother Teresa, according to People magazine.

Indian film director T. Rajeevnath, who is making a movie about the late Mother Teresa said the 25-year-old socialite is on his short list of actresses to play the Nobel Prize winner.

The director said Hilton shares a close "facial resemblance" with Mother Teresa.

Yes, but does her vagina resemble the Great Mother's? Because, admittedly, that is the attribute we've seen the most of these past three years.

I will now lace up my ice skates and take a turn on the River Styx.

Previous Comments

ID

105953

Comment

Several years ago, I read a book about Mother Theresa named "The Missionary Position." It detailed abused by the holy mother, namely a) the fact that she took millions of dollars in donations from Keating that was stolen from S&L's and refused to return any of it, even though it was the savings of ordinary people, b) misreported the effectiveness of her poverty-relief efforts, and c) was abusive to the people in her care, in hardcore Jesuit style, making them sleep on wooden planks to get closer to God, etc. Of course, you're never going to convince anyone that Mother Theresa was a meanie, since her name is now culturally synonymous with perfect charity. Nevertheless, maybe Paris Hilton would be the right choice for this role, even if not anatomically.

Author

Brian C Johnson

Date

2006-05-10T12:33:35-06:00

ID

105954

Comment

That's hot. Cheers, TH

Author

Tom Head

Date

2006-05-10T17:19:13-06:00

ID

105955

Comment

I've seen unglamorous expose on Mother Teresa, too. Some of it seems believable. Paris would make a good nun. From what I hear she hasn't denied anyone NONE. She's kind of cute, too.

Author

Ray Carter

Date

2006-05-11T14:02:46-06:00

ID

105956

Comment

Are they crazy???? I CANNOT stand her. Ugh

Author

tiffitch

Date

2006-05-11T15:51:27-06:00

ID

105957

Comment

I'd like to apologize for my previous comment on this particular issue. It was disrespectful to Paris in particular and women in general for me to say what I said earlier. And it was unbecoming of me. Anyway, what disqualifies Paris from playing or pretending to be a nun. From what I hear, many of the nuns in the Catholic church are pretending to be nuns. I have heard all kinds of stories about nuns and priests doing the freaky-deaky daily, and nuns getting pregnant to boot. I won't even mention the priests' fetish for little boys. The great philosopher and comedian, Don D. C. Curry, says "if you need some, you just need some. No need in pretending." I hope my apology is well accepted and no further pun is received about Paris or anyone or any institution.

Author

Ray Carter

Date

2006-05-12T12:45:42-06:00

ID

105958

Comment

I can't work with this crap. Paris Hilton and Mother Teresa in the same article?! The joke practically makes itself. I'll be in my trailer. Well, the empty lot where I pretend I have a trailer.

Author

Nick

Date

2006-05-18T14:50:16-06:00