Brother Hustle (singing): "Ohhhhhhhhhh, the economy has become so frightening, while gasoline prices are steadily climbing. Crime, apathy and poverty plague the poor. I'll just hustle, hustle and hustle!
"Why is this Christmas holiday such a melancholy time for the broke, busted, overworked and underpaid individual? It seems as if most of the corporate Scrooges have regressed to their selfish, greedy ways, while the working poor Mr. and Ms. Cratchets struggle with fixed wages within a war- torn economy. Repent, Scrooges, before Tiny Tim goes postal!
The Ghetto Science Team Economic Development Association suggests that financially challenged individuals save their money and shop at the first annual Mistletoe Christmas Holiday Super-Discount Marketplace.
"Purchase affordable items such as refurbished and recycled plastic Christmas wreaths and trees, no-name-brand MP3 players, used Playstations, secondhand toys and clothes, and the Don't-Touch-My-Butt Elmo Doll. (Buyer, beware: The aforementioned items may be contaminated with lead poisoning.)
"Miss Doodle Mae of JoJo's Discount Dollar Store has clothes for the grown folk at her 'Look Your Best for Christmas Discount Clothes Chest.' And the Church Hat Sisters have recycled Christmas church hats for sale.
"I, Brother Hustle, have plenty of holiday refreshments: cool and fruity Juicy Juice for the kids, hot-n-toddy apple juice for the adults, and Grandma Hustle's Secret-Special-Blend Eggnog for the seniors.
"And Bruh Sylvester is back selling Breast-N-Plants Christmas decorations and Missing-Toe art.
"Happy holidays from the Ghetto Science Team Economic Development Association!"
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