Jackson Free Press

Cootie McBride: "On behalf of the McBride Family Center for Helping Everyone Get Their Act Together in the New Millennium, I want to thank everyone for attending the state of emergency conference titled 'Self Destructive Tendencies Within a Recessive World.'

"I would like to summarize this conference by quoting Shakespeare: 'To thine own self be true.' But I'm also inclined to use Nurse Tootie McBride's summary: 'We're just foolin' ourselves!' I would combine both quotes to say: 'Be true to yourself and not fool yourself.' And remember to hold on to your dreams and money.

"Nevertheless, I invited a very distinguished family member and spiritual advisor, Rev. Preacher McBride, to close the conference with a brief and profound prayer. Everyone, please bow your heads."

Rev. Preacher McBride: "Our father who is in heaven, please make the cost of gasoline dip below $2.97. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done. And global warming weather trends are confusing every one. Give us this day affordable food products, like milk, meat, veggies, eggs and bread. And forgive us our wasteful spending habits, as we forgive those who price gouge, outsource jobs and freeze wages against us.

"And lead us not into poverty, but deliver us from apathy, greed, division, privatization of health care and education, high energy bills, worldwide recession and the war on terror. We know we're messing up this world. Pleeeeeese help us get our act together, because you are for peace, love and universal understanding. Amen!"

Previous Comments

ID

76027

Comment

Rev. Preacher McBride: “Our father who is in heaven, please make the cost of gasoline dip below $2.97. I believe it, and I receive it! LOL

Author

LatashaWillis

Date

2008-01-30T19:58:36-06:00