Jackson Free Press

I'm torn. I wrote in my column this week that it is indeed a great time to be alive. These days will be recorded for posterity, and stories will be told to generations not yet here about the year 2008. The year that an African-American and a woman both ran for the presidency of the United States. The year that Jackson saw what $750 million looks like at work. The year that we had a spirited debate on NOT whether we would build a civil rights museum, but WHERE to build the museum. The year that my generation rose up and said NO MORE! We want in! I felt change had finally come to Mississippi.

I have never been more proud of my city and state as I have been in the past few weeks. But adversely, I have never been as disappointed in my city and state as I was during the Civil Rights hearing on March 11. Never have I felt so abandoned by and pessimistic of SOME of those who we have called our political leaders, elders, and mentors. For the first time in a long time, I may have very well lost confidence in some of those who I and many others have looked to for guidance and counsel. I am fatigued after a short but grueling battle to ensure my city does not become a wasteland. But frankly now, it's hard for me to look my son in the eye and tell him that those we have elected or placed in positions of power and influence in this city truly have his or my best intentions at heart. How can I continue to tell those who look to ME for leadership that we must be vigilant and work through bureaucracy? How can I continue to spite a seemingly flawed system, encouraging others NOT to be cynical when cynicism seems to be the only way to deal with constant disappointment in our city's leadership?

I AM disappointed in that commission. For one, not having anyone under 40 to serve. Are any of us not worthy? Are we not intelligent? Have some of us not been educated at the same institutions you love so dearly? Or do we even matter? Two, not being transparent. And three, downplaying your own faults to highlight someone else's. You say that a civil rights museum is not supposed to be used for its money-making potential, but then we learn that that same museum will be used to employ and give scholarships to Tougaloo students. To give a facelift to the Tougaloo campus. To beautify the campus surroundings. To garner you taxpayer dollars. Dollars that will fund what appeared to me to be a "city within a city." Doesn't seem unifying to me. An emotional, yet political decision that could serve to be one that probably wasn't in the best interest of the majority of Jackson citizens. A decision that had no input from the PEOPLE and one that will ultimately be partly funded by the PEOPLE. Yet, you ask us to respect you, to trust you, to defer to your wisdom. What happens when that wisdom appears too costly? I will say this. I don't mind losing a fair fight. Kudos on the vote. I will be at the museum...many times. I just hope my grandson gets to see it too.

I AM disappointed in my city leaders. Why? Because I wouldn't even be penning this letter had we been on our toes. Moss Point Mayor Xavier Bishop put it best: "A world class city does not wait until the 11th, 12th hour to make its case for something as significant as a NATIONAL civil rights museum." Amen. If you're gonna TALK it...then you have to WALK it! From the outset, there was seemingly no one person lobbying to get this museum. We as a city appeared distracted. It was only through the Herculean efforts of a few that we were even allowed to come back to the table. But alas, we have lost a stadium and now a museum for lack of focus, and the blame is such that it can wrap around this city twice and be distributed to hundreds of people! Goliath felled by David. Beaten by its own arrogance and unpreparedness. I watched a lot of you in this city and in that room Tuesday stay silent. Scared to speak up. Scared to challenge a perceived elite. Many that I asked to step up, KNOWING they agreed with me, did not. I may never know your intentions and I'm not mad at you either. But I now know better. Understand, it's hard to be encouraged to speak up and let my voice be heard...be a fighter...be a leader... when I stand by and watch my predecessors remain tight-lipped because they fear financial or political retribution. With all due respect, there are more black and white votes than the ones in that room. Those folks hold no influence over us. Remember that! This is one man's words.

If you are reading this, do some soul searching. Many of you have been our champions. Many of you have been our beacons, our conductors. HOWEVER, many of you have failed us, and consequently our children. Left to deal with the mistakes and errors in judgement that many of you have made, my demographic may be forced to sort through the shambles of what is left of our great city. It may not be evident to you now, but this life is a game of chess, not checkers. Those who don't have foresight will be mated. A people with no vision will perish. Currently, some of our officials have only seen fit to make decisions that can cement their personal legacy. Decisions that may seem plausible for 10 years but not 20...or even 50. Just long enough to make THEM look good. These decisions are ones that WE will have to deal with in those 10, 20, or 50 years. Decisions that WE were not allowed to help make. So please understand my frustrations.

I was blessed to be a part of an effort that taught me a few more things.

* A ship without a rudder will float aimlessly at sea, moving all the while but only going in circles (or nowhere).

* A process flawed from the beginning will be a flawed process at the end.

* It's almost impossible to win a fight with both hands tied behind your back.

* And...those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.

I considered conceding defeat today. I thought today that a few dissident voices could never overcome an entire system. What was I even fighting for? Maybe I should just do my music and let the political chips fall where they may. A lot of my colleagues get a lot more sleep, have a lot less stress, and make a LOT more money by being apathetic. Perhaps I should just go back to that. Especially when there are the usual few who question my intentions. Sometimes it's just not worth it. My mounting anger over the museum, Farish St., the murder rate, the exclusion of young folks from the table of power, have me thinking..."My album's ready. Why am I bothering with this?"

But then, I think about my son and I am motivated again. I think about how proud I am to say I'm from Jackson and how I one day want HIM to say the same thing. How I want HIM to stay here and use his innumerable talents to better this city. How I want HIM to stick his chest out with pride when he goes to other states and proudly decrees he's from Jackson, Mississippi...and the people are awed. How I want him to live in a city that knows no color. How I want him to speak out, to lead, to not let any and every ordinance, law, or injustice - political or economic - go by without question. THAT'S the Jackson we are...NOT what I've seen lately.

I have to respectfully ask that those of you who have been remiss in your duties, if you will not step aside willingly, then you will be removed. Some of you have done us a disservice. Retire, remove yourself, or fade into that beautiful sunset. We appreciate your diligent service, but I think it's in all our best interests if we take it from here. After Tuesday, I know now more than ever that it is time for new blood. You almost got rid of me then, but alas, the reports of my (OUR) demise have been greatly exaggerated. I made new allies...others who said they want to change the status quo, and we ALL live to fight another day.

Kamikaze

Previous Comments

ID

117630

Comment

Wow, Kaze.

Author

DonnaLadd

Date

2008-03-11T18:02:22-06:00

ID

117631

Comment

Rock on, dude.

Author

LatashaWillis

Date

2008-03-11T21:57:52-06:00

ID

117632

Comment

LOVE this. Amen and amen.

Author

andi

Date

2008-03-12T08:13:11-06:00

ID

117633

Comment

awesome, so well said & on point...

Author

lanier77

Date

2008-03-12T08:18:20-06:00

ID

117634

Comment

Kaze iam ready to fight with you man, tell me when and were and i'll be there.I feel more than ever now the need to be involved and fight for Jackson more because i see Frank Melton just let this happen. Kaze heres my number 601 291 0798, My name is Terence Williams. Lets do this iam ready to fight for Jackson.

Author

NewJackson

Date

2008-03-12T08:23:30-06:00

ID

117635

Comment

Don't give up, ever. Not every battle is a victory...think about what is right, which is not always what is expedient. You cheer us on as a voice for Jackson and in the past year you have expanded your reach & opened your mind!!!! TY!

Author

Izzy

Date

2008-03-12T10:15:27-06:00

ID

117636

Comment

I second that, Izzy. I, too, know what it's like to enthusiastically work toward something that doesn't turn out the way you thought it would, and the opposition is painful, especially when it comes from folks who are supposed to be on your side. After reading your post, I am tempted to rethink some things myself and see whether my vision deserves another shot in the arm.

Author

LatashaWillis

Date

2008-03-12T10:35:15-06:00

ID

117637

Comment

:) Your son AND the young people of Jackson. Keep doing it for them. And then when WE are not young anymore, we'll have that head on our shoulders, knowing to include them. We listen to them. Not many do. Keep the faith.

Author

emilyb

Date

2008-03-12T19:13:48-06:00

ID

117638

Comment

Kaz: I just finished a conversation with an older Freedom Fighter who is still fighting against the mindset you spoke of so eloquently. We were discussing the need for him to involve a younger set of people in a fight he has been involved in for over thirteen years. We discussed at length the exact same things you spoke of in this piece. I am absolutely honored I will be able to forward this piece to him. I am 47 years old and of late I have felt absolutely helpless in my quest to help turn the minds of the citizens of Jackson toward their own interests. I have watched helplessly as those in positions of power squirm, shuffle and dance around those with money as long as they throw a few crumbs our way. Tonight you have renewed my hope that there is power among the people if we can just find a way to help them take ownership of this city I love and call home.

Author

BuyJxn

Date

2008-03-12T22:35:28-06:00

ID

132322

Comment

Since the posting of this blog, what's the status of New Jackson, now?

Author

mssweetie

Date

2008-07-23T05:46:30-06:00