Jackson Free Press

Rev. Cletus: "This is your car-selling pastor on the Ghetto Science Radio Network, broadcasting live from my lube and oil change garage. Please excuse the background noise; my mechanics are busy refurbishing several Double Dutch Church buses for our new Rapid Transit Public Church Bus System.

"The Ghetto Science Department of Transportation has designated H.O.V. (High Occupancy Vehicle) lanes for the church buses. And one of my deaconesses, also a graphic designer, just finished the logo. So, look for my fleet of Double Dutch Church buses on ghetto streets next week. Bus fare is half price for my tithers, and $2 for the public. Love offerings are also accepted.

"I want to end this broadcast with a prayer for our troubled nation and world:

"Lawd, have mercy on us. In America, tornados come to our shores, destroy property, displace people and weaken the economy. The price of gas, food and energy is too high for folk living on fixed incomes. Poor folk must work three jobs just to make ends meet. It seems like the people we elect to lead and manage our cities, counties and states have turned their backs on us. The paradigm of prosperity has shifted toward greed. And while the rich reclaim urban areas and maintain their lifestyle, middle-class and financially challenged individuals lose their jobs, homes, dignity and sanity.

"Give us strength to endure this weather-driven, price-gouging crisis, and the motivation to vote for true change. Amen!