Jackson Free Press

Nurse Tootie McBride: "Ghetto Science Public Television presents a special edition of ‘Break it down for the People World Report.' Tonight's topic is: ‘Should Poor Folk Cry over Spilled Oil in the Gulf of Mexico?' With me in the studio to discuss this topic are Mister Ice Creamy Man and Chief Crazy Brother, representatives of the Ghetto Environmentalists of America.

"Break it down for the people, Mister Ice Creamy Man."

Mister Ice Creamy Man: "This oil spill tragedy is just a bad allegory—a hole spewing thousands of gallons every day. And does the corporation responsible for this environmental mess realize its impact on humans, animals, water, food, land, business, tourism, etcetera? I guess the responsible oil company forgot about what happened in Alaska around 1989. And I'll always remember 1974, when an old former president from Plains, Ga., warned this country about its overindulgent dependency of oil. Eventually, poor folks will pay for this oil slick at the gas pumps. Bring me my ‘Sham Wow' super absorbent crying towel! It looks like the ice cream truck will run out of gas again."

Nurse Tootie McBride: "So what's on your mind Chief Crazy Brother."

Chief Crazy Brother: Remember that Keep America Beautiful commercial where the Native American man paddles his canoe into the polluted and debris-ridden shores of industrialized America? If he saw this oil spill today, he would break down like Florida Evans did on the television show ‘Good Times' and scream, ‘D*mn, D*mn, D*mn!'"