Jackson Free Press

It always make me cringe and fidget whenever someone answers a clear case of discrimination, or other un-nicety common among a certain group of people, with, "Well, so-and-so does it, too." We've always heard it here in Mississippi from apologists for white supremacy and racism, but I also hear it way too often when the subject of domestic abuse comes up. If you mention the epidemic of male violence against women, way too many people—men and women—will respond immediately that women do it to men, too, thus trying to negate that, overwhelmingly, women are the vast majority of domestic-abuse targets. It helps nothing, and actually hurts the cause, especially considering that one of the big challenges behind fighting domestic abuse is getting people of both genders to understand the roots of the problem and that "boys will be boys" attitude undergirds so much violence against women and girls. And the only purpose of this false equalization is to make some people more comfortable, not to solve the problem. Tackling these kinds of issues aren't supposed to be comfortable; in fact, just the opposite.

To point, I just saw this quote pop up in my Twitter feed (@donnerkay): "The worst form of inequality is to try to make unequal things equal." ~ Aristotle

Some people seem to think that talking about the problem of male violence somehow indicts all men. What a nonsensical argument. Why would a man who doesn't abuse possibly be threatened by such a conversation? It is insulting to good men to assume that they would be. I am very fortunate that my life partner Todd feels the same way I do about these issues and can discuss them without flinching, or believing somehow that people are talking about him. Of course, he was raised by a remarkable strong woman who taught him well.

Previous Comments

ID

161497

Comment

"Of course, he was raised by a remarkable strong woman who taught him well. Dang Todd, was your dad that bad?

Author

Duan C.

Date

2011-01-07T12:21:01-06:00