Jackson Free Press

Rev. Cletus: "This is your car-sales pastor closing a special live radio broadcast from the front lot of Rev. Cletus' Car Sales Church. I hope you all enjoyed my message titled 'Don't Worry about the Crap Hitting the Fan: The Creator Has a Master Plan.' Thanks to the 'Good God Gospel Quartet for their rendition of Rev James Cleveland's song called 'Where Is Your Faith?'

"I know that many of you have wept, wailed and cried in the wilderness of life's problems and issues. A whole lot of frustrated and discouraged listeners have called my Counseling and Encouragement Telephone Hot Line. I have counseled several of the unemployed gospel emcees and deejays who talk about human-resource departments discriminating against them because of their age, race or gender.

"Also, I spoke to a man who said, 'Financial oppression is getting to me!' Nevertheless, some divine wisdom touched my heart enough to refer to the poignant words of Rev. Cleveland, and I told this man, 'No matter how strong you think you are, things will go wrong.' Then I asked him, 'Where is your faith?'

"I realize that our society has become more hardhearted and selfish. But allow me during these troubling times to encourage you the way Adam Clayton Powell (the legendary minister, politician and civil-rights activist) did when he told his Harlem, New York, constituents to 'keep the faith, baby!'

"God bless you, listeners! Don't worry about the crap hitting the fan: The Creator has a master plan."