Your best friends are supposed to be your biggest supporters, offering constructive guidance and support through the stressful wedding planning period. But oftentimes, even your best support systems buckle under the strain. Dealing with these bridal party members (affectionately termed "M.O.B." or "Menaces of the Bride") can be frustrating, hurtful and disappointing for the bride-to-be. Every bride needs to know how to manage certain situations involving members of the M.O.B. to avoid fallouts and, ultimately, ruining your special day.
Problem: You want a turquoise and black rock 'n' roll-themed wedding. Your mother believes this is too over the top and argues that you should save the theme for your reception and have a traditional wedding. You want the wedding to start at 6 p.m., but she believes the wedding should start at 2 p.m.
Solution: Dealing with an overbearing mother can be quite difficult. You respect her opinion and appreciate her assistance; however, you must set boundaries early in the wedding planning process. First, write down your wedding plans from the selection of a theme, if desired, to your color scheme preference. Then, stick to your selections!
You can delegate certain tasks to your mother that are in conjunction with your plans; for example, she can pick up the turquoise flowers you have ordered. Also, allow your mother to accompany you on your wedding-dress fitting and food tasting, but kindly remind her that the ultimate decision is yours to make. Know that your mother means well, but her desires should not become yours.
Problem: You select your best friend as your bridesmaid or maid of honor. However, she has not completed any assigned tasks, makes negative remarks about the wedding and refuses to cooperate.
Solution: Be upfront and honest with your friend and ask her the reason she has been distant. She may have a legitimate reason for her lack of interest. If she continues being unreasonable (make sure you are not being too demanding), find ways to involve her in a minimal way. You could ask her to assist with making wedding favors, for example. If you are continually met with refusals or lack of cooperation, it may be time to select another bridesmaid or maid of honor.
Problem: Your knight in shining armor would rather goof off with his friends than help you decide if Aunt Minnie should sit next to Cousin Lola at the reception. He just wants to show up at the wedding and say "I do." You, however, want him to equally participate in the planning.
Solution: Relax! Men are programmed differently than women. He does not care if you want tulips or calla lilies. Delegate to your guy simple tasks such as selecting a limousine company or the DJ for the reception. His apathy is not a sign to be a runaway bride unless he seems completely disinterested.
By using these tips you can turn your Menaces of the Bride into Friends of the Bride.
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